Warrior Encounter with Ronnie Santana

Josh (00:00:03) - So I'm here with my homeboy Ronnie. 2023 Jasper, Georgia. The heart of a warrior encounter. And this is your first experience? My first experience. Ronnie, tell us a little bit about who you are and how did we originally meet? Oh, man. Well, let's speak a little bit up because it's a little bit windy. We met in 2007. Um, in the EMS fire department. Working as paramedics, EMTs on an ambulance service and then connected ever since they are doing zip lines into the water. And that water is cold, man. It is. It's. That's got to be. Yeah. Yeah, definitely. I mean, it's 62 degrees out here right now. So if you hear a loud screaming, we're not getting murdered. They're doing zip lines into the thing. So we met 2007, 2007. Um, you know, the ambulance service got absorbed by the fire department. Josh went to the city. I went to the county, saw each other on calls. We both left around the same time about 2012, just so it doesn't blow in the water.

Josh (00:01:17) - I'm bringing it just a little bit closer. Yeah, it's a little sketchy. Yeah. And. I think we connected on LinkedIn, stayed in contact a little bit. Um. And then I moved back to Ocala because I moved away around that time. Moved back to Ocala. And, um, and then we reconnected by actually being listening to one of Josh's podcast and him sharing his story. Um, and so I reached out to him and we've been probably closer than what we've never been before. Yeah, it's amazing. We live in a small town called Ocala and we've crossed paths so many times. We went to the same school just at different times. We were in the fire department and the emergency medical services together. But just like we saw each other many times and it was like, Hey, Ronnie, Hey, Lauren. Hey. He's the family, you know, like. But we started getting close. I moved back in town, and you were one of the first guys who connected back with me in 2020.

Josh (00:02:17) - And our families live right around the block from each other. But one day you get a text message about this event. Or phone call or somehow like what went through your mind when you saw that the call to go with me to this event and that way this little I'm going to put my foot down just just in case. Well, when I got that text message, you know, it came at the right time. You know, personally going through a storm, still going through that storm, trying to figure it out and, you know, drawing closer to God during that time. And, you know, the last three, four months, I've been closer to God than I have been in the last four years, 4 or 5 years. And so I had been already soul searching and digging in. But then you sent that text and I was like, I didn't even hesitate. I said, I'm going, Yeah, signed up, paid for it. And then I told the wife, Hey, I'm on this weekend.

Josh (00:03:17) - Yeah, but I definitely needed it. And it's been a huge blessing to be here. Yeah, dude, you have such a gift that when you see something, you. You want to go like you're just in, man. Like you're committed, you're in. You start moving down a direction. And I love that about you, man. I love that heart that you have of. That's good. That's needed. Quick prayer. Quick out. I'm in. Yeah. And then what? I've known about you for. For a while is when you say you're. You're in and you're. You're in. Especially for your dudes. Especially for the people in your life, of course. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, you know, I love people that are in my life. I care about others. I care about people, and I just want to help. Yeah. You know, so. So we drive up me, you for other dudes, right? So we're, we're in a big SUV, but grown ass, man.

Josh (00:04:14) - And you and I are the smallest of them all. Yeah. Talked about, like, sitting in a car that long. That's not your wife and your kids. We're not back in high school playing baseball or wrestling. You're in a truck with a bunch of dudes heading up somewhere. Like, what was going through your head? What was going through your heart? What were some of the the conversation sparked there? Oh, you know, it was just you know, at first it was exciting, you know, meeting new guys, you know, having a good conversation, really good knowledgeable guys, you know, guys that have loved the Lord and sharing their story. You know, at first it was a little uneasy, but, you know, but once you hit the road and you just started driving and talking, you kind of just start feeling, God, just, you know, coming into the car, just sparking conversation and it just gets your mind going. And then I just started thinking like, you know, I get to unplug this weekend and really dive into me in my story and dig deep.

Josh (00:05:14) - Of things that have been rooted for years. Yeah. And so driving up here, you know, I told myself that I'm going to go back a changed man and with would change of heart and change mind. So you said yes before you could think about it, right? Like you're like, I'm in, you know, like Josh, my dude. I trust him. We're buddies. He knows what I'm going through. I know what he's going through. We're walking together in life. He put the call out. The answer is yes. After you said yes, did any insecurities, fears, anxieties start kicking in before coming to this event? Did you almost back out? Of course. Um, almost. I thought about backing out, but I knew I couldn't because I knew that. God led you to text me and invite me in. My reaction was God. Especially with the place where I'm at in this season of life. There was no way that I'll back it out. I got to go no matter how.

Josh (00:06:17) - So that's, you know.

Ronnie (00:06:19) - And if God's hand is in it, then, oh, hey.

Josh (00:06:24) - That's even a better shot. Look at. I'm in there too, guys. It is so windy. I should have totally hook this up with other mics. Oh, gorgeous man. We're in the mountains. This is beautiful. We got mountains behind us. Houses up there. Um.

Ronnie (00:06:38) - But yeah, you know, you start.

Josh (00:06:40) - Thinking like, you know, what do I pack? What do I bring? I'm not a I'm not a camper. I'm. I'm a Puerto Rican guy who doesn't speak Spanish, you know? But do I bring boots? Do I bring shorts? Like, you know, you start thinking like one of the dudes is going to think about me with me bringing a luggage. I don't have a duffel bag or I mean, I had to order a sleeping bag because I didn't own one of those, you know, And you start thinking, Well, I fit in.

Josh (00:07:06) - Well, they guys think about me. Yeah. What if. What if I'm uncovered that I don't have my shit together? Yeah, right, exactly. But that's just the devil, I think. Just putting those things in our mind, you know, when God is trying to work. But, you know, I mean, we're all dudes, man. We think we know it all, you know? And out of 240 guys here, 10,000 were called. 240 showed up. Those are the warriors, right, that they show up. Now, there's guys who wanted to come in life circumstances. Right. I just want to hold that just in case the wind doesn't blow. It is windy, man. You hear the water. This is a lake, but the is moving in and such. But, you know, like we showed up and then the the good stuff started happening. But I think that we have these fears, these anxieties of what if I don't measure up? What if I'm found out? What if they asked that one question? I'm in the middle of a job.

Josh (00:08:04) - I don't have as much money. I you know, I'm going through a marriage issue or I have parenting issues or kid issues or, you know, health issues. And all these things go through in my mind. And what if the guys here find out? Yeah. Did that go through your head? Um, I mean, it didn't really go through my head because I think I'm in a place where, like, I'm, I hate to say comfortable. I mean, because life is uncomfortable sometimes, you know? But secure. Secure. Yeah, I'm secure. And who I am, my walk with God. But it was more of the fact of what am I going to find out about myself that I didn't know for all these years that I'm going to have to go back home and deal with like what? You know, like. Like why do I have anger? Why have I believed the false self and have thought all these years that I'm unloved and unseen and unheard? You know, like these questions you got to start asking yourself.

Josh (00:09:10) - Like, why have I lived all these years thinking that and believing it, you know? But, um, you know, it's just questions that a lot of guys don't ask themselves. I mean, I wouldn't have asked myself these questions if I didn't come to this event. Yeah, like, yes, you and I going through Fire Academy and, you know, back in the day and you go, Josh, Ronnie, how do you know you're feeling unloved? I'd look at you and be like, What the hell are you talking about, dude? Unloved. I'm getting booty or I'm, you know, I'm picking up, you know, whatever. Yeah. You know, before I was married, of course I love you enough. But, you know, like, this idea of unloved, you're like, No way, man. I've got friends. I've got. Look at my new cell phone. Back in the 2007, I moved from pager to cell phone. You know, like the idea of like but then you get more friends and you still feel in love sometimes.

Josh (00:10:00) - Man. Yeah. Yeah. So how do you know when you. Are feeling unloved and respected, unseen, unheard. How does that show up in your life? How does that. How does that. How does that force you to do something or encourage you to do something? I think that. I'm a pretty in-tune guy with like, my emotions and my feelings, and I feel like that's in part of being in touch with God, knowing God, but also doing some self reflection, listening to podcasts, reading, you know, And, and I feel like when I start to get angry about life and when I start to be short with my kids or my wife or something will do something, I'm like, why? Like, why did you, you know, and, and then I stop and I think I'm like, Who was that? Who was that that just showed up? That's not me. Yeah. And so then it makes me reflect. And then. And then that's when I started thinking like, okay, I need to do some self work here, you know? And then I feel like that's where that love kind of comes in.

Josh (00:11:14) - So for a dude out there who is starting to feel that. I don't like. I'm acting out and it's not really me like that. That wasn't Ronnie, like. Like, normally I'm when I when I feel healthy, I act this way. I feel okay. I don't see anything that's wrong. But I responded in a way that didn't feel like me or I'm doing activities or actions that don't feel like the true me. What advice do you have for that guy? Or word of encouragement. I would just start with getting a pen and paper and asking yourself some questions. You know, I started writing. You know, I was telling Josh earlier, I'm not a writer, man, but, you know, this this trip I've wrote probably 5 or 6 page full pages, front and back. That's probably the most I've written in the last five, six years. And, you know, to get a pen and paper and right man, it just dig deep and think and ask yourself those questions.

Josh (00:12:14) - What questions? Just questions of who am I? Why am I here? What purpose do I have in this life that I'm living? And, you know, you start you just starts with those couple of questions and then things just come out of nowhere. Yeah. And then you start to really get to know yourself as you dig deeper and you. And you take that walk with God. You know God's there, man. He's just waiting for. For you to. Just to open up that door. Yeah. Can I ask you a few questions? Sure. What do you call someone who runs a runner? What do you call someone who swims? Swimmer. What do you call someone who writes something down in a piece of paper? Writer. Buddy, You're a writer. Oh, man. He just wrote a stack in the journal. A stack of stuff that's overflowing in his heart. And I look over as we're going through these sessions and he's being prompted and dude's writing, and he says, Man, I got this journal and I can't wait to share this with my wife.

Josh (00:13:14) - So she understands what's going through. But I bet, man, if some of that stuff is shared with another dude who might be hurting, he goes me to. But a lot of times those guys go, I'm not a writer, I'm not a speaker, I'm not a guy. Fill in the blank. But you just proved yourself wrong, man. You are a writer. So say I am a writer. I am a writer. All right. So let's do this, man. Pray for the dudes out there, and let's close it out. God, thank you for bringing Josh back into my life when you did. Thank you for allowing us to arrive here safely and receiving the message that you have given us through Michael Thompson and Zoe and and the guys that have shared and thank you for just this beautiful life that we live, these fires that you put us in and you take us out. And just thank you for allowing us to find out who we are and to learn from you. We love you and we praise you, Lord, and bless the rest of the weekend and bless the dudes out there.

Josh (00:14:17) - And I hope that. You will touch somebody and you just say, amen. Amen. And maybe if you want some of your writings, head on over to Uncensored Advice for men. There's little form. And if you say, Hey, I want to see some of your writings, send him over. I'll share them. All right. Love you guys. Love you.