Finding the End of Your Rope with Matt Jennings

Josh
 Hey, Hey, good day, fellows. Welcome to uncensored advice for men. My name's Josh, and this has been fun. We've done over. I can't count a lot of episodes. We're, we're close to 200 in the past year and a half of launching this and we've interviewed pastors, porn stars, kind of everything in between to bring a microphone and to bring some tough advice sometimes for us guys. With that, we're going to have a conversation with an entrepreneur and a guy who's devoted to lifting up guys, and we want to have a chat with them. So Matt, welcome to the show. 

 Matt
 Thank you, Josh is going to be here. 

 Josh
 Yeah, man. Why don't you tell us who is Matt? 

 Matt
 Well, so yeah, first off I'm a child of God that I have to say that because that's, my men's group is kind of built around that thought as far as that's my number one identity. Beyond that, I'm a serial entrepreneur, multiple businesses, most, I guess well-known when is choice by kingdom trust, which is an in the digital currency industry in alternative asset industry in Jenko fishing, which is actually a company me and my son started years ago that he runs now, but I also own several different real estate companies. Most recent of which is called storage for community, which is a startup in the self storage industry where we're going into communities and building self storage that gives back to the local community. So I have a wife named Kelly. I've been married for 28 years, son Colton who's 23 daughter, Avery who's 20 living, Kentucky. 

 Matt
 Part-time, Florida part-time and yeah, that's about, that's kind of me in a nutshell, I guess. 

 Josh
 Sounds good, man. Sounds good. Well, I appreciate you sharing. So where do we even begin? Because before hitting record, you were about to tell the story of some struggles you went through and you found yourself in the forest looking up at the sky, pointing something, pointing something at your head. Why don't we start there? 

 Matt
 Yeah. So, many years ago this was back in around 2004. I, I, I was at a point in my life where I felt very empty, lonely, I, all those words, right. My wife and I had kind of went through a rough patch. We had two little kids at the time and I F I, I left the house, went, stayed over at our farm and a cabin. We have over at our farm and I sit out on the porch and I said, God, I don't even know if you're real or not. Like I grew up in a really strict Christian home and went to a really strict Christian school from kindergarten all the way through my junior year of high school and saw a lot of, church fats and splits and, your first grade teacher sleeping with the pastor and all that kind of stuff, and just, I just very much rebelled when I got old enough, which led me to that day. 

 Matt
 I ended up just taking a bottle of tequila and a bag of pills and a shotgun. I took off walking and I walked way back into the middle of nowhere and it started raining. This was in the middle of the night. It started raining, sat down under a tree and laid there and thought and cried and, drank some of the tequila, took a couple of pills and thought about like, this is going to be a turning point in my life. I gotta do something different. Something's got to change. And, I, I sat there and I thought about taking my life and eventually chose not to. And, and I told God, I said, I'm going to trust you one last time. And, but you've got to show yourself to me, like, I've got, you've got to show yourself to me. I, I shot the bottle of pills in the bottle and, and took off walking back home, actually got lost and ended up about two miles from the airline, another road and had to get a ride back. 

 Matt
 Once a daylight came, but, and it was amazing just the very next day, how things started being revealed to me and through different people that popped into my life. And, through that, I met a guy that eventually became my pastor and, and really turned my life over to him and got my wife back. She turned, ended up turning her life over to him. And, and, and that's when I, not long after that's when I started, my first businesses were not, was not too long after that. And, and lock has been good. 

 Josh
 You're sitting there pills in hand bottle, the tequila shotgun over the shoulder. You didn't, you didn't plan on lugging that stuff back to the house, right? Like you planned on going, I'm checking out here, took a few swigs, took a few pills now for me, when I drink tequila, I make dumb decisions. Right. Just let's be clear about that. You throw on any type of, weed or pills on it. In addition to that, there's no way I'm making any logical decisions. Right. It's just the truth, right. Anybody who's ever done any of the above we'll will say, yeah. How in the world did you not shoot yourself? 

 Matt
 I don't, I don't just the grace of God is all I know. I just, as I sat there and thought about my kids and my wife and kind of how I had been acting and living, and I don't know, it was just like, something came over me and said, trust me, it can better. It can be different. And, and I chose to take that path and, and, and very soon thereafter, the very next day, I started seeing things change in my life. 

 Josh
 I think it's so weird. I've, I've interviewed maybe a thousand people or so. In any time the story of suicide or potential suicide comes up, people had a turning point. It's almost like I got to the end of myself. I'm standing on the bridge, I'm me in 2012 or 13 issues, whatever I'm thinking of Swan dive, and often, headbutting the concrete down below. And I felt God, speak to me. I was like, all right, this is weird. You know? And, but I don't know if that's, if that, if I had to get to that place, I don't know. 

 Matt
 No, I think we definitely have to get that place. If you read Jesus's sermon on the Mount in Matthew five, the very first thing he says is blessed is he whose at the end of his rope, because there he'll find lists of the self and more of God and this very first thing he taught. So, yeah, I think, I definitely found the end of my rope that night. I call it kind of getting lost before you get saved. If you want to talk in church terms, but you got to get to the end of that row. 

 Josh
 I got to the end of my rope and I thank God I didn't right now, three kids later or whatever, but this must happen only in Kentucky. Right? You, you should, the pills, you should, the bottle you're walking back. You get fricking loss probably because you're drinking too much tequila. And now sunrise is happening. Cause you said it was overnight and you had to catch a ride. So you're walking down the road. This guy looks a mess, tequila in his hair and everything, the shotgun, his hand. And they pick you up. No problem. 

 Matt
 Oh yeah, no problem. I knew, I knew it was an old farm around you, the guy. He picked me up and drove me back. 

 Josh
 I'm being buddy, come on, Mac hop on it and bring your shotgun only in Kentucky. Does that happen? So, all right. You show up to the house and the wife sees you walk in the house and the kids see, or the kids were young. Right. Like you walk in the house, shotgun, you smell like crap. You're wet. Cause it was raining all night. What did that. 

 Matt
 Weren't there actually, they weren't there. I was, we had separated and I was at, at a cabin on my farm. That was not our house. So they got David. They weren't there. 

 Josh
 Okay. Okay. Got it. You had time to clean up before you saw her again. What was the first conversation back with a wife from that moment? Like what was the first, was it a phone call? Was it a face-to-face? What was the, what was the first conversation after that? 

 Matt
 The next morning I was, when I got back, I was supposed to keep my kids. I cleaned up and she brought them in, dropped them off. I sat in there all day and played with them and it was just like, it was different. It was like, I saw them differently than I ever had. Hadn't probably been a real good dad up to that point. One of them was a little over a year old. My daughter was, my son was probably three and she came to pick them up and I followed her out to the truck and I said, Hey, can I talk to you a minute? And she really didn't want to talk. I kind of hemmed her up. I just told her, I said, something happened last night. I just want you to know that I'm sorry. I'm a different person standing here today than I was yesterday. 

 Matt
 She got in the car and she left. And, but then the next day she called the, the pastor counselor that she had not been willing to really go talk to. She called and told him she wanted to talk. And, and through that, we worked things out and drew a line in the sand, decided to pass. Wasn't gonna, you know, predict the future. And in. Ran off together for a week and didn't have sex sat in a hotel room and just talk, had room service for every meal. Didn't turn the TV on. I tell a lot of people, I like, I really feel like that's like when I really like got to know my wife was that week before that laugh was just a blur of fun and partying and working and chasing things and, monetary things and toys. I think we liked each other, but we didn't really know each other. 

 Matt
 I don't think. We've been married for, I don't know, I guess seven or eight years at the time. 

 Josh
 Wow. That was kind of, it was kind of your honeymoon, right? Yeah. 

 Matt
 We had our honeymoon like late in life, I guess. 

 Josh
 Got it. So, all right. You walk out to the car and you're like, Hey, I want to talk to you. I'm gonna change, man. Right. How many times has of us guys have done that? And we get the same response. Okay. Yeah. Right. I've heard this before drive off, but for you, it was different. Did you find yourself having to do, you said that, but did you find yourself having to actually show up and prove it, right. There's one thing about saying it and then doing it. What, what happened in? 

 Matt
 Yeah, I think, at that moment, I think she thought, yeah. Right. After the conversations we had with the pastor, counseling us, I think she truly believed it or she wouldn't have came back with open arms, like she did, but then obviously there was a time period. There I'm certain where she wanted, to see somebody that was different and she did and, everything was good from there, but I can only imagine if I had acted the same way and treated her the same way. It probably would not have went so smoothly. 

 Josh
 Yeah. Let's do this. Right. That turning point in the woods was a major turning point. After that, you said after that, I, I kind of went on this path of proved myself better. Dad started some businesses. Right. So that was a massive turning point. Let's just say you didn't shoot yourself. Let's just say you didn't, go through the process of reconciliation with the wife. What would you look like now compared to, finding God really in that, in the woods behind a bottle of tequila? 

 Matt
 I don't even like to think about it, to be honest. I don't, I don't really know. And I'm glad I don't. 

 Josh
 I think of the turning points in my life and I try to look back and I go, what if I didn't? What if I didn't, answer the call? What if I didn't say yes, what if I would have made a poor decision when I had that opportunity? Right. Because opportunities will seek out, especially naughty ones. Right. I asked sometimes I like to think about what if, and then I, usually I look at my kids and I go, wow, I'm thankful. I didn't. So, all right. We, we go on and we start some businesses, right. You said, early on you guys were workers, you y'all were having fun. You were chasing money and having a bunch of adventures and such, but it was after that is when you got into the business mindset. Why did that happen? 

 Matt
 I just, I'd always been an entrepreneurial minded person. Honestly, I think one of the reasons that, not blaming anybody for my issues, but I think one of the chips I had on my shoulder before that night was against really both my dad and my wife. I worked in a family business with my dad, and I felt like he, he wouldn't, I basically ran it, but he wouldn't turn it over to me. He had a partner that was just a mess. I wanted to leave the family business, which he was very much against. My wife was very much against and I wanted to go do my own thing. I wanted to start a business. I felt like she didn't believe in me. And he didn't believe in me. They were kind of the most, two most important people around that, particularly, in my life and particularly around that. 

 Matt
 That was a lot of, kind of the anger inside of me, I think before that day. Then, after that night, and after we, patched things up, she became very supportive of me, whatever I wanted to do really. Very faith, her very, she had faith in me and in who was guiding me. Right. She got behind me, then I quit my job still against my dad's will with which he today he and I, we have a great relationship and he'll tell anybody, that's the best thing for me and him. Both that ever happened, I quit working for him and went and I'd actually, didn't start a business. That moment. I went to work as a real estate appraiser for a guy in town making about a fourth, what I was making, working for my dad, I never went to college, so I have no education, anything like that. 

 Matt
 I went to work as a real estate appraiser associate, and yeah, I went and I went to school cost $1,200 to go to school. I had $1,300 to my name and slept in the truck in the parking lot. Ate peanut butter sandwiches. Yeah, the whole, yeah. I mean, and got my associates, license associates, praisers license, and about four or five months after that, the craziest thing ever happened to me in my life happened. I can tell you that story if you want me to, but it's pretty well. 

 Josh
 I do. Before you do, it's amazing for real estate entrepreneurs, me too. I would go to the dollar store, dollar general or the dollar tree or something like that. I could get a, a packet of Graham crackers and a thing of peanut butter. $2 and 12 cents essentially, or whatever. I could eat for, two to three days just on that. 

 Matt
 Yeah. 

 Josh
 Yeah. Our breasts smell like crap, but at least we had some protein and some carbohydrates to keep us going. Oh man. Yeah. Peanut butter keeps real estate people in the game. Right. 

 Matt
 Keeps you going. Yeah. 

 Josh
 Cool. All right. You said the most amazing thing happened to you in that. What was that? 

 Matt
 I told you that my pastor was, who had kind of counseled us back together. We'd gotten started going to church there and he wasn't my pastor before I met the guy, literally the day after I was under the tree. Wow. And, and so he becomes our pastor. We're going there and building a new building and I've been donating my time to build a new build and stuff. Didn't have any money to donate. We're going to have the first service there on this certain Sunday, and they do this, what they call 30 pieces of silver offering, where everybody brings in 30 quarters or nickels or dimes or whatever throws in a bucket. It makes all kinds of noise. You give a sacrificial love offering as well. That year it was going for the building for the church building. That morning on the way to church, our kids had their little bags with their quarters in it. 

 Matt
 We all, we all had our little bags put in there and my wife asked me, he said, how much are you going to give? I had, we had about a thousand dollars to our name and we had bills due that week and blah, blah. I thought all the way there and something in my heart said give a thousand dollars, which was all I had. And, and I got there and I wrote a check for $500. We put her money in the bucket, put the check in the bucket and we head home and she looks at me and she says, it's going to be all right. She thinks that I'm upset because I gave so much and I didn't know how to pay the bills. Right. I'm upset because I didn't feel like I gave what I was supposed to, but I'm thinking, well, it's over now. 

 Matt
 You know? That night we're having our first meeting in the new church and we're meeting, in our launch lounge chairs and stuff. Cause it's just a shell of a building. They announced the offering that morning was 80 something thousand dollars. Literally the guy right next to me, I don't even steal a date. I don't know who he was. He stands up and he says, well, I want to give 500 more dollars. If 20 something more people will do that we'll have a hundred thousand dollars. When he said that immediately, I just stood up. After church was over, I'd take Ricky, he's my pastor, another check for $500. I told him, I said, now don't put this in the bank like tomorrow, because it would have bounced. I literally went home and cleaned out the pickle, jars, the ashtrays and everything. I had enough to put $1,002 in to that bank account. 

 Matt
 I went out and looked at the gas gauges in the cars. One of them had a quarter tank. One of 'em had a half a tank. And I found myself that night. I went out in the backyard and I laid flat on my face in the grass. I said, I gave you everything about, months ago, which was when I actually, after the tree deal. Now I truly had nothing and I can't pay my bills. I can grab a work like one or two days. And like, I'm your I'm out? I just laid there flat on my face. On Sunday night and Monday morning I went to work and I came home and I stopped at the mailbox on the way in, and there's, stack of envelopes in there. I thought, oh God, this, and I kind of dreaded it. I started going through them and there was a couple of bills in there, but if you get emotional to them about, but there was two checks from two different people. 

 Matt
 One of them was a guy who had owed me for about nearly eight years for a boat that he had bought and never paid for him. Wow. It was $3,600. And there was a check in there. He said, sorry that I did this to you. I mean, I tried to take him to court and everything and never could get money years before. I'm sorry. I did all that. Here's you a check. The other one was from another guy who owed me for some work that I had done years and years before I'd wrote off yours together is about $7,000. I just, I was just blown away, ? I go in, I tell my wife, I'm crying, I'm oxide. I'm like, man, we had a thousand dollars and now we got $7,000, ? I went into work the next day. My boss, as I said, I was real estate appraising. 

 Matt
 My boss came in and said, Hey, you ever thought about owning a real estate appraisal business. You're really good at this. Not only been working there, a few months or whatever. I didn't know if it was a trick question. Cause he was a young guy, pretty young guy. And I said, yeah, sure. Long story short that day I bought that business and he financed it for me. He was ready to get out. He was having some issues and that all happened within two days. That was on Tuesday. That Friday I'd put a, there was a sealed bid auction for some land in the town where I lived and I put a bid in on it that Friday to purchase it. I got the bid scared me to death. I didn't know how they ever pay for it, but I got the bid and I went over there on that Saturday just to walk around the property and look at it. 

 Matt
 As I was walking around, a neighbor, came out and said, man, I sure would lock this property behind my it's about 60 acres. It joined a bunch of subdivisions and he especially would love to have this behind my house. I walked on around long story short. I met four neighbors that said they'd love to have what was behind their house. I broke it into four pieces and called them all back that day on Saturday and sold it and made $110,000 on it. That all happened within a week of the day that I laid in the back yard completely broke. That led to me starting my own businesses that I have now, that was my start. I mean, that was where I got the seed money and things to do everything I'm doing here, 

 Josh
 Man. It took you years to get to a spot of brokenness. And then once you humble yourself, right? Absolutely things, things moved for you. There's I grew up in a super religious household, right? Mom was super religious. Dad was the wild ones, sex jokes, rock and roll and put those together. And here comes Josh. There's a Bible verse that says, God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble my whole life, man. I've been battling this thing called ego. I'm, I'm a five foot eight, but I feel like I'm six foot nine, like I feel like a linebacker, but I'm a tiny guy, but my ego is massive. And I've had. 

 Matt
 The definition of ego is. 

 Josh
 Please tell me, idiot. 

 Matt
 Did this, the Anastasia that numbs the pain of stupidity. 

 Josh
 Yeah, yeah dude. Yeah, absolutely. It makes sense. 

 Matt
 The original to me actually it was a guy named Rick Rigsby. I heard say that one. 

 Josh
 Matt, actually I called you Matt a few times. Do you prefer Matt or Matthew? 

 Matt
 Matt. 

 Josh
 Okay, cool. Matt. So I'm glad I got that. Right. So, so from there that was kind of the Kickstarter then, fast forward today, you're, you were one of the largest digital asset holders in the country, one of the first and largest, right? Like what kind of AUM are we talking about? What kind of, what kind of. 

 Matt
 Well kingdom, the company that I started in 2009, just a few years after that, it's not all digital. We, we do all kinds of alternative assets besides just the Bitcoin. That's just what we're most well-known for. We've got about, well over a hundred thousand total clients and about 20 billion in assets, under custody. 

 Josh
 Okay. From, from a spot where you had $2 in your bank account and you could barely drive to work a week later, a hundred K this, fast forward to that. Let me ask you a question. Let's just say you had that without finding the brokenness. Let's just say you came into that kind of money, that kind of success, that kind of opportunity without the brokenness moment, the end of your rope moment, the repentance to the wife moment, those kinds of things. This is another one of those things where I say, what if though, what are your, what are your thoughts? How would you have responded to that kind of responsibility of wealth and stewardship? 

 Matt
 I would think not, well, it probably would have broken. It probably would have broken me, ? Money's, true wealth, it's with one thing we talk about and the juice is the secret sauce to treat wealth. I don't want to give up all the secrets that's within the coaching program case. Somebody listened to this wants to join my coaching program, which is free by the way. I'm not, I'm not on here trying to, I'm not on here trying to a plug for money, but there's that to me, true wealth isn't abundance, right? Jesus talked about, he came to give us the abundant life and it's an abundance of in your relationships. It's an abundance, of knowing that your needs are met and they're met abundantly and that's your relational needs. Your spirits will need your, and your financial needs play a role in that. But, and if you got one, if you got, if all you got to the money, part of that, you don't have anything. 

 Josh
 What other major life lessons have you learned in the process? Right? It could be business. It could be about personal stuff. Like if you look back and you're like, man, these are major turning points in my life, but here's some golden nuggets that I pulled from this. 

 Matt
 One of them is it. I express in my men's coaching program, we call it be, do have, it's a principle. That I think most men struggle with because the true key to life is living a be, do have lifestyle. Most men live a do have be livestock. What I mean by that is most men think they have to do something and then they'll have something because of what they do. That will make them be something right. In other words, you can work really hard and then you'll have a lot of money or toys or whatever, and then you'll be a successful man, right? At that point, that's why most people think. I would argue. Jesus taught that you should have a be, do have mindset, which is this. You should just be you. The number one most incredible need we all have is to just be us and to not have to fit in, right? 

 Matt
 Because if you belong, you don't have to fit in. You gotta know you belong and just be you and be who you were created to be. When you be that you will do things, you'll do things from your heart. You'll do things that you were created to do. You will have an abundant life, a wonderful life, a wealthy life in what I would call the standards of. Well. It's basically be more, do less, right. And, and stop worrying about doing and concentrate more on being, 

 Josh
 I like that man. 

 Matt
 Authentic. 

 Josh
 So with this juice, the juice, right? That's your men's program. Why the heck did you choose that name? Like, what's the meaning behind that? 

 Matt
 Well, if I told you the whole thing, it would kind of ruin it, 

 Josh
 Okay, so let's do this. Though, if you share as much as you want, but what we could also do is if you'd like to learn more click on the link kind of thing, so we could send people your way. Right. 

 Matt
 So, well, when we go, I'm a big fish man. Me and my son are big fishermen. We own a fishing lure company, one of the fastest growing ones in America, we love fishing. When you're out fishing, when you get that secret lure, you always say, Hey, I got the juice, and you kind of keep it quiet and you go back to the dock and you got this big sack of fish and everybody's like, what'd you catch it on? It's like, I can't tell you, but then you'll go over to your closest friends and you'd be like, come see me later. I'll tell you I got the juice, ? It's like the secret sauce, the secret bait. They come to you later and you make sure that there's no like bugs or drones flying over and you quietly tell them, what, the secret literary, as it's so top secret and it's kind of silly how fishermen act that way, but they did. 

 Matt
 I, and the other places, I only people use that term that I know of are drug dealers and fishermen, I spell it J U C E for this program. There's a reason it's spelled that way, but I'm not going to tell you want somebody to have to come to find out what the spelling and why it's that way. That's the idea behind it is I feel like I know the secret sauce to true wealth and I've lived it, I've lived through it. I've seen it happen. I love to share that with other men and particularly other entrepreneurial men, people who feel like, one of the first things we asked men that come in is, do you feel like you're always trying to get somewhere or get something you pushing and hustling and grinding to get what you want. You don't have to push hustle and grind to get the finer things in, in life. 

 Matt
 And another question we like to ask them as if they feel like they're being pulled through life by passion or pushed through life by fear. 

 Josh
 Okay. Pulled by passion or pushed by fear. 

 Matt
 Yeah. 

 Josh
 What's the difference? 

 Matt
 Well, if you're being pulled through life by passion, it's like a force that's pulling you every day through your day, whatever it is you're doing. Right. It's this force it's just passionate and it comes naturally from inside you to be pushed by fear means that, you're trying to get the promotion at work because you're afraid what might happen if you don't what people around. You might think if you don't or or that you can't pay your bills, if you don't, or, your wife will find it's my, it makes more money than you. If you don't, what I'm saying? All the different fears that men have as they, as they strive through life. As they listened to all these lies that were told all the time about what a man is supposed to be. 

 Josh
 Yeah, dude, I've heard all those lies. How do we deal with those lies? 

 Matt
 Yeah. You got to know who you are. You got to know the truth. You got to know you belong and you don't have, that you don't have to fit in. You always counter lies with truths in, in my opinion. I think one of the other things that is that I've learned in life, that's key to being able to pull this off is in, in the section, that juice where we talk about it's, it's called breaking the stick. We talk about how everybody goes through life. We all have a bunch of sticks and they're invisible. You can't see them. And you think they're harmless. You don't really think about them very often. You think they're harmless, but every one of these sticks, it's a measuring stick. You know? If you think about like a yardstick, we all have these sticks and the sticks are how we use them to measure ourselves. 

 Matt
 We use it to measure, off of like, what's a good father. What's a successful man. I mean, do you think Jeff Bezos stick looks anything like the guy who owns the local grocery store here in my town, both of them probably achieve their dreams and rightfully successful in their own minds in a lot of ways. But, but their sticks are, you can't even measure them on the same stick. And, and we go through life and we constantly look at other people. We look at their relationships, we look at their wives, we look at their businesses, we look at their, whatever it is and our sticks constantly, the further we go, our stick just moves. It's like we add on to the stick. We can never get to the top. Right? It's it constantly moves. Jesus said, judge, not lest you be judged. Well, every time we measure ourselves and this, social media is the world's worst place in world. 

 Matt
 I mean, it's been the biggest advocate of making it worse. Every time we use that stick. Instead of just looking at ourselves and being our true selves, we start trying to measure ourselves against other people. We're automatically judging ourselves and who, who likes to be judged, ? And, and the worst kind of judgment is self judgment. 

 Josh
 I'm a very, I would consider myself a very driven dude. Right. A lot of it in the past, I think has been fear pushing me. Right. I want people to like me. I want it to be important. I want to be the man. I want people to stand up and go, Josh drive. I need that need of approval. I, I wanted to earn it from dad. I wanted dad to go, dude. I am so proud of you. Look at you. You're crushing it. Right. That pain, to try to be something also destroyed me, man. Like you go bankrupt. I went bankrupt trying to get love and respect and significance, 

 Matt
 Which you thought you had to do something in order to be something. 

 Josh
 I did. 

 Matt
 Yeah. 

 Josh
 The funny thing is after going bankrupt and half after having nothing and having to say, sorry, a lot and having to repent a lot and just humble myself, like I wish I had more, like the bar was already like crushed down to the measuring stick was laid on the ground. From there on like everything I did beyond that was good. I do find myself being more after that. I looking back, I had to lose it all. I really did it, man. I really like this. Cause it's these kinds of conversations are like mirror. Sometimes that I can hold up against myself and be like, man, I had to go through that too dude. Like I wish I didn't. I wish I was smart enough to watch you go through and be like, I'm not doing that. You know? No, I want to do it too. 

 Matt
 I don't have the same way. 

 Josh
 Yeah. 

 Matt
 I'm going to say here to tell you, like ever since I met Jesus and all that happened, I it's, it ain't been perfect. Matter of fact, it's been rough we've we went through some rough spells at times. What I found during every one of those rough spells is that he's never left me. I just leave him. You know, I, I just quit. I quit. I quit. Honestly. I just put it. It happens usually is when I quit, I quit being comfortable with who I am and I get scared or I get scared and I find myself taking it, kinda like laugh into my own hands, ? And it never works out well. And I find myself crawling back. The great news is just like the story of the prodigal son in the Bible. When we, when we come crawling back or, walking back home, he's always there arms wide open putting sandals on her feet and the ring on her finger, and as opposed to judging us and very different than the God IGERT that I grew up being taught about. 

 Matt
 I guess she's. 

 Josh
 How old are you Matt? 

 Matt
 49. 

 Josh
 Oh, sweet. Okay, cool. What is one thing that you find yourself struggling with today that you're trying to work through and how are you doing it? 

 Matt
 Wow. You mean, I got one name one. 

 Josh
 Yeah. Give us your juiciest. Nah, whatever one you feel comfortable with talking about. 

 Matt
 I, it's, it's the same thing for me over and over, honestly, like, people talk about the thorn in the flesh and all that. And mine is definitely fear. Being pulled through life by passion from knowing who I am and, and I've gotten better and better at that. I still, when we had a little blip, well, you Bitcoin industry right now is terrible. Right? There the monetary seal, the financial kind of system on the backside of it, companies are blowing up, they're going broke they're and it's, it's had a big effect on our business thing. Think, thank goodness, not a detrimental effect on our business, but there's been some tough times over the last few months we had to lay a few people off first time we've ever done that. I can tend to sometimes let fear overtake my face if I'm not careful. And, and I, I jumped out of it quicker than I used to. 

 Matt
 Thank goodness. But I went through last few weeks. I've I've had spells where I've had to be like, Hey, wake up, you didn't, somebody got you here and it wasn't you. How do you think you're going to fix everything? You know? And yeah. So that's my biggest one. I guess. 

 Josh
 I'm afraid to buddy, I'm afraid with what's going on in the economy. I'm afraid of, like, I got young kids, I've got businesses that we're building, I'm starting to, have need to hire people and grow and I'm afraid. 

 Matt
 Yeah. 

 Josh
 How do I, and I'm a man of faith. How do I, how do I tip the scales on faith and fear? 

 Matt
 And it's difficult. It's just like, I'm starting a new startup in the self storage industry called storage for community that, has idea of give, how to give back through that. And, you know, we started it back. I mean, when we started, I started putting it together the end of last year and we've just kinda got it finished up. We're going to raise of capital for that right now. And, last week were going to start doing it and I just dreaded even calling anybody, to be honest with the kind of, like you said, with the situation in America and where everything's at. I just thought, man, this is going to be difficult, but I'm so passionate about this business and the opportunity that's there. I did it and, but I really had lots of doubts going through my head and gosh, it's, I think we're five of 5, 6, 7 days into it. 

 Matt
 We're 75% full already, what normally takes months. In, why was I so fearful about that when I was asked, so scared about that, why would, why did I dread and put off for weeks making that first phone call, instead of just having faith in who I am and the business plan that God put in front of me, which involves helping people. Right. And, but I let fear creep in and get ahold of me. So that's my biggest one. I I've, I bounced back and forth in and out of that wrote a lot. And, I don't know that anybody ever actually gets completely out of where they didn't never bounce in and out of the rut. Right. It, th I tell my guys in my thing is we talk a lot about consciousness and, we all go through life and with our unconsciously reacting to things that happen around us based off of experiences we've had in the past, how we've reacted in the past, we just unconsciously react to everything. 

 Matt
 Yeah. Big thing we talk about is learning to consciously create lives instead of unconsciously reacting to life. The thing I tell them is like, what, if you go unconscious a hundred times a day, that's fine. As long as you wake up and become conscious a hundred times a day. Yeah. It'll become 90, then it'll become 80. Then it'll become 70. And, as you live your life and I'm that way with my consciousness around fears, it gets less and less. It, and it lasts shorter lengths of time, but they, I still get worried. I was born that way. I think. 

 Josh
 I hear you, man. I hear you during this interview, for guys who are like, listen, I want to know more about juice. I want to know more about your business. I want to know more about, self storage and how to get involved work. Where could dudes reach out to you and connect with you? 

 Matt
 We're building a website and a Facebook page for the juice right now. It's up, but I'm honestly don't remember what the. 

 Josh
 Pages. 

 Matt
 Or we just start, we're just putting it up. 

 Josh
 Can I put your LinkedIn, 

 Matt
 LinkedIn, LinkedIn is probably the best place or Facebook me personally, on my Facebook or Jenko fishing. If you message there, they'll get the message to me. Yeah, my LinkedIn, Matt Jennings, my Facebook, Matt Jennings, just re send me a personal message to have. I'd love to be a part of your groups. We're going to do the next. We just took about 30 something guys through it. We just finished last week. We're going to do another group starting in August sometime. I think so, if anybody's interested in going through it is a 10 week program. We have an app that we communicate through. It's all virtual. So you can do it from anywhere. We do different times of the week to try to accommodate people. After you go through the program, then we still leave you in the app. We kind of, then we combine all the groups together and everybody kind of hangs out and we're having a July 9th. 

 Matt
 We're having a big lake hang out, down here at my house. We're all going to the lake and skiing and playing and having a big time and all that. So, so it's really like a men's fraternity really. 

 Josh
 Now July, I love how you Kentucky and say July. All right. What we'll do is we'll put that in the show notes. When you do get your updated website, you can always ping us and say, Hey, add the screenshot. 

 Matt
 Send it to you when we get off your, 

 Josh
 Okay. Sounds good. Dudes listening to this episode, man, as always reach out to our guests and say, Hey, thanks for being on the show. Thank you for being vulnerable, sharing the things that you've learned, because guess what guys, whether you're 49, 40 or 14, right? We all struggle with things different times, different things, but it seems like men struggle with similar patterns. So, my encouragement to you guys is reach out to one of our guests and say, Hey, you're, you've worked through something that I'm working through. Can you help me? Right. Guys, we need to get really good at asking for help. That's called humility and cool things happen when we humble ourselves. Anyways, that's enough of my rambling, Matt, thanks for being on the show. Dudes love you guys. If you need any help, you can always head on over to uncensored advice for men.com or if you want to be on the show and talk about some things, maybe you've learned along the way, and you want to share it here on sensitive vice for men.com. 

 Josh
 Fill out a quick form, get you on the show next till then talk to you all on the next episode. See you guys.